apparently, apple cider vinegar is the cure-all of the gods. last night at the cedar door mark, kelly, and i were discussing the houston mosquito plague when our ever-so-polite bouncer/cocktail waiter broke in with: "apple cider vinegar."
"what?"
"apple cider vinegar. it gets rid of mosquito bites."
"you mean, it, like, sucks out the poison and shit?"
"yeah, and it'll keep it from itching and everything. also works for other bug bites. my grandmother told me about it. she said it will heal anything."

step in an ant bed?
apple cider vinegar

live in houston infested by mosquitos?
apple cider vinegar

strange rashes?
apple cider vinegar

extremities falling off?
apple cider vinegar

is there anything this stuff can't do? keep a jug with you at all times!


as a side note. i am pleased to announce the arrival of murphy's paw.